Mistress vs. Wife — What's the Difference?
By Tayyaba Rehman — Updated on October 26, 2023
Mistress is typically a woman in a relationship with a married man; a wife is a woman legally married to a man.
Difference Between Mistress and Wife
Table of Contents
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Key Differences
The term Mistress often refers to a woman who is involved in a romantic or sexual relationship with a man outside the bond of marriage. Wife, on the other hand, denotes a woman who is legally married to a man and is typically recognized socially and legally as his partner. The distinction between these two words primarily rests upon the legitimacy and societal acknowledgment of the relationship.
Mistress can sometimes carry a negative connotation, suggesting secrecy or a relationship based on deceit. In many cultures, mistresses might be viewed with disdain due to the violation of marital vows. A Wife, conversely, is in a socially sanctioned relationship and holds a position of respect and honor in many societies.
However, the word Mistress isn’t always negative. Historically, a mistress might have been a woman of power or influence, with the term signifying control or ownership. The word Wife has also evolved over time. Traditionally, wives might have been viewed as subordinate to their husbands, but modern interpretations see wives as equals within the partnership of marriage.
Mistress and Wife both have varied meanings in different contexts. While a mistress might be considered a secret lover today, in past centuries, she could've been openly acknowledged by society, albeit not given the same status as a wife. A Wife represents a legal and often religious bond, characterized by mutual rights and responsibilities.
Comparison Chart
Relationship Type
Often extramarital
Legally married
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Societal View
Sometimes viewed negatively
Generally respected and acknowledged
Historical Context
Can denote power or control
Traditional symbol of partnership in marriage
Legality
No legal standing in partner’s life
Has legal rights and claims
Connotation
Can imply secrecy or deceit
Implies commitment and union
Compare with Definitions
Mistress
A woman in charge of something or in a dominant position.
She is the mistress of her own fate.
Wife
A woman considered in relation to her spouse.
She became his wife after a whirlwind romance.
Mistress
A female owner of a pet.
The dog eagerly awaited its mistress's command.
Wife
A woman joined to another person in a committed relationship.
She has been my wife in every sense of the word, even before our wedding.
Mistress
A woman who has a continuing sexual relationship with a man who is married to someone else.
Wife
A female partner in a continuing marital relationship.
They have been husband and wife for over 20 years.
Mistress
A woman in a position of authority, control, or ownership, as the head of a household
"Thirteen years had seen her mistress of Kellynch Hall" (Jane Austen).
Wife
A wife is a woman in a marriage. A woman who has separated from her partner continues to be a wife until the marriage legally dissolves with a divorce judgement.
Mistress
A woman who owns or keeps an animal
A cat sitting in its mistress's lap.
Wife
A woman joined to another person in marriage; a female spouse.
Mistress
A woman who owns a slave.
Wife
A married woman, especially in relation to her spouse.
The Fisherman and His Wife
Mistress
A woman with ultimate control over something
The mistress of her own mind.
Wife
The female of a pair of mated animals.
A new wife for the gander is introduced into the pen.
Mistress
A nation or country that has supremacy over others
Great Britain, once the mistress of the seas.
Wife
(Scotland) woman.
Mistress
Something personified as female that directs or reigns
"my mistress ... the open road" (Robert Louis Stevenson).
Wife
To marry (a woman)
Mistress
A woman who has mastered a skill or branch of learning
A mistress of the culinary art.
Wife
A woman; an adult female; - now used in literature only in certain compounds and phrases, as alewife, fishwife, goodwife, and the like.
On the green he saw sitting a wife.
Mistress
Mistress Used formerly as a courtesy title when speaking to or of a woman.
Wife
The lawful consort of a man; a woman who is united to a man in wedlock; a woman who has a husband; a married woman; - correlative of husband.
Let every one you . . . so love his wife even as himself, and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
Mistress
Chiefly British A woman schoolteacher.
Wife
A married woman; a man's partner in marriage
Mistress
A woman, specifically one with great control, authority or ownership
Male equivalent: master
She was the mistress of the estate-mansion, and owned the horses.
Wife
A woman legally married to a man.
He introduced Susan as his wife at the family reunion.
Mistress
A female teacher
Male equivalent: master
Games mistress
Wife
A woman, especially a matronly one, who manages her household or takes care of her family.
She's always been the perfect wife, managing all family affairs seamlessly.
Mistress
The other woman in an extramarital relationship, generally including sexual relations
Mistress
A dominatrix
Male equivalent: master
Mistress
A woman well skilled in anything, or having the mastery over it
Mistress
A woman regarded with love and devotion; a sweetheart
Mistress
(Scotland) A married woman; a wife
Mistress
(obsolete) The jack in the game of bowls
Mistress
A female companion to a master a man with control, authority or ownership
Mistress
Female equivalent of master
Mistress
Female equivalent of mister
Mistress
Of a woman: to master; to learn or develop to a high degree of proficiency.
Mistress
(intransitive) To act or take the role of a mistress.
Mistress
A woman having power, authority, or ownership; a woman who exercises authority, is chief, etc.; the female head of a family, a school, etc.
The late queen's gentlewoman! a knight's daughter!To be her mistress' mistress!
Mistress
A woman well skilled in anything, or having the mastery over it.
A letter desires all young wives to make themselves mistresses of Wingate's Arithmetic.
Mistress
A woman regarded with love and devotion; she who has command over one's heart; a beloved object; a sweetheart.
Mistress
A woman filling the place, but without the rights, of a wife; a woman having an ongoing usually exclusive sexual relationship with a man, who may provide her with financial support in return; a concubine; a loose woman with whom one consorts habitually; as, both his wife and his mistress attended his funeral.
Mistress
A title of courtesy formerly prefixed to the name of a woman, married or unmarried, but now superseded by the contracted forms, Mrs., for a married, and Miss, for an unmarried, woman.
Now Mistress Gilpin (careful soul).
Mistress
A married woman; a wife.
Several of the neighboring mistresses had assembled to witness the event of this memorable evening.
Mistress
The old name of the jack at bowls.
Mistress
To wait upon a mistress; to be courting.
Mistress
An adulterous woman; a woman who has an ongoing extramarital sexual relationship with a man
Mistress
A woman schoolteacher (especially one regarded as strict)
Mistress
A woman master who directs the work of others
Mistress
A woman in a relationship with a married man outside of his marriage.
He introduced his mistress to his friends at the party.
Mistress
A woman who has control over or responsibility for someone or something.
As a teacher, she was a strict mistress.
Mistress
A female schoolteacher, especially of the past.
The school mistress taught multiple grades in the one-room schoolhouse.
Common Curiosities
What are the rights of a wife in a marriage?
A wife generally has legal rights, claims, and mutual responsibilities with her spouse, often protected by laws and regulations.
How does a wife differ from a mistress?
A wife is legally married to a man, while a mistress is in a relationship outside the bond of marriage.
Is being a mistress socially accepted?
The acceptance of mistresses varies by culture and society; in some, it might be frowned upon, while in others it's more tolerated.
Can "wife" refer to non-heterosexual relationships?
Yes, in places where same-sex marriages are legal, a woman can refer to her female partner as her wife.
Are there historical instances where mistresses held power or influence?
Yes, throughout history, some mistresses held significant influence over powerful men and played roles in political or social scenarios.
What is a mistress in the context of relationships?
A mistress is typically a woman involved in a romantic or sexual relationship with a married man outside of his marriage.
Can "mistress" have a non-romantic connotation?
Yes, "mistress" can refer to a woman in charge or in a dominant position, not necessarily in a romantic context.
Is there a male equivalent for "mistress"?
The term "lover" or "paramour" can be used for a man in a similar position to a mistress, but there's not a direct male equivalent with the same societal connotations.
Does "wife" always refer to a legal bond?
While "wife" commonly refers to a legal bond, it can also signify a committed relationship even if not legally married.
What responsibilities does a wife typically have in a family?
While it varies by culture and personal choices, a wife might manage household affairs, take care of children, or support her spouse emotionally and financially.
How has the role of a wife evolved over time?
Traditionally, wives might have been viewed as subordinate, but modern interpretations see wives as equals within marriage.
Do both "mistress" and "wife" carry cultural or societal weight?
Yes, both terms are heavily influenced by societal norms, cultural values, and historical contexts.
Why might someone have a mistress instead of a wife?
There can be various reasons including emotional, physical, or social aspects that drive a man to have a mistress alongside or instead of a wife.
How has the perception of "mistress" changed over the years?
Historically, a mistress might have been openly acknowledged; today, the term often implies secrecy or an extramarital affair.
Can "wife" be used in non-romantic contexts?
While predominantly romantic, "wife" can refer to female partners in activities like "fishing wife" to mean a female fishing companion.
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Written by
Tayyaba RehmanTayyaba Rehman is a distinguished writer, currently serving as a primary contributor to askdifference.com. As a researcher in semantics and etymology, Tayyaba's passion for the complexity of languages and their distinctions has found a perfect home on the platform. Tayyaba delves into the intricacies of language, distinguishing between commonly confused words and phrases, thereby providing clarity for readers worldwide.