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Reserved vs. Restrained — What's the Difference?

By Maham Liaqat & Fiza Rafique — Updated on April 5, 2024
Reserved individuals often choose to share less about themselves, while restrained people control their impulses and emotions.
Reserved vs. Restrained — What's the Difference?

Difference Between Reserved and Restrained

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Key Differences

Reserved people tend to be quiet and cautious in their social interactions, preferring not to reveal too much about themselves or their feelings. They might choose to keep their thoughts and emotions private, valuing their personal space and inner world. On the other hand, restrained individuals focus on controlling their impulses, actions, and expressions of emotion. This self-control can apply to various aspects of life, including speech, physical actions, and emotional responses.
Being reserved is more about a preference for privacy and a tendency towards introversion, affecting how one chooses to communicate and interact with others. Conversely, being restrained is about self-discipline and the conscious regulation of one's behaviors and reactions, regardless of one's natural inclinations or emotional state.
Reserved individuals may naturally prefer solitude or small, familiar social settings where they feel comfortable. This preference doesn't necessarily stem from a lack of social skills but from a personal choice about how they engage with the world. Restraint, however, involves a decision to hold back one's immediate reactions or desires, often as a matter of principle or due to external expectations.
The motivation behind reserved behavior often relates to an individual's personality or comfort level with sharing personal information, while the motivation for restraint can be more situational or ethical, aiming to meet certain standards of conduct or to achieve specific outcomes.
Understanding whether someone is reserved or restrained can influence how we interpret their actions and communicate with them. Recognizing a reserved nature can help in creating a more comfortable environment for sharing, while acknowledging restraint can lead to an appreciation of an individual's self-control and consideration for the context of their actions.
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Comparison Chart

Definition

Choosing to share less about oneself.
Controlling impulses and emotions.

Focus

Privacy and introversion.
Self-discipline and regulation of behavior.

Social Interaction

Prefers solitude or small groups.
Can interact broadly, but with controlled behavior.

Motivation

Personal comfort with sharing.
Ethical, situational, or outcome-driven reasons.

Communication

Limited sharing of thoughts and emotions.
Careful expression of thoughts and emotions.

Compare with Definitions

Reserved

Preferring not to share personal information or feelings readily.
She's quite reserved, rarely discussing her life outside of work.

Restrained

Holding back immediate reactions or desires.
She wanted to criticize the plan but stayed restrained, recognizing the effort behind it.

Reserved

Tending to be quiet and reflective, avoiding the spotlight.
His reserved nature makes him a great listener.

Restrained

Limiting expressions of emotion or impulses for ethical or situational reasons.
The team felt frustrated, yet everyone remained restrained during the difficult meeting.

Reserved

Valuing privacy and thinking carefully before speaking.
Her reserved demeanor is often mistaken for aloofness, but she's just very private.

Restrained

Demonstrating self-discipline in behavior or speech.
His restrained response to the provocation surprised everyone.

Reserved

Choosing to maintain a certain distance in social settings.
Even at parties, she remains reserved, observing rather than engaging.

Restrained

Being deliberate and measured in one's actions or words.
Her restrained joy at the announcement showed her professionalism.

Reserved

Being cautious about revealing one's thoughts or emotions.
Despite being passionate about the project, he remained reserved during the meeting.

Restrained

Exercising control over one's actions or emotions.
Despite his anger, he remained restrained and handled the situation calmly.

Reserved

Reserved is a Polish clothing store chain, part of LPP, which has more than 1,700 stores located in 20 countries.

Restrained

Kept under control; subdued or moderate
Restrained laughter.
A restrained foreign policy.

Reserved

Slow to reveal emotion or opinions
He is a reserved, almost taciturn man

Restrained

Characterized by self-restraint; reserved
A restrained and self-effacing manner.

Reserved

Kept specially for a particular person
A reserved seat

Restrained

Prevented from moving; held down or secured
Restrained passengers.

Reserved

Designated as unavailable except for a certain purpose or user; kept in reserve
A row of reserved seats near the stage.

Restrained

Held back, limited, kept in check or under control.
He greeted her for the first time in three years with a restrained embrace.

Reserved

Given to or marked by self-restraint and reticence
A reserved person.

Restrained

(obsolete) Proscribed, restricted.

Reserved

Simple past tense and past participle of reserve

Restrained

Simple past tense and past participle of restrain
He was restrained by the straight jacket.

Reserved

(comparable) Slow to reveal emotion or opinions.
He was a quiet, reserved person.

Restrained

Cool and formal in manner

Reserved

(not comparable) Set aside for a particular person or purpose.
I'm sorry, sir, but these are reserved seats.

Restrained

Under restraint

Reserved

Kept for future or special use, or for an exigency; as, reserved troops; a reserved seat in a theater.

Restrained

Marked by avoidance of extravagance or extremes;
Moderate in his demands
Restrained in his response

Reserved

Restrained from freedom in words or actions; backward, or cautious, in communicating one's thoughts and feelings; not free or frank.
To all obliging, yet reserved to all.
Nothing reserved or sullen was to see.

Restrained

Not showy or obtrusive;
Clothes in quiet good taste

Reserved

Set aside for the use of a particular person or party

Restrained

Free from ostentation or pretension;
The restrained elegance of the room

Reserved

Marked by self-restraint and reticence;
Was habitually reserved in speech, withholding her opinion

Restrained

Prudent;
Guarded optimism

Reserved

Cool and formal in manner

Common Curiosities

Why might someone choose to be reserved?

Reasons for being reserved include a preference for privacy, comfort levels in social settings, and personality traits leaning towards introversion.

How does someone show they are restrained?

A restrained person controls their impulses, actions, and emotions, demonstrating self-discipline and a measured response to situations.

Can a person be both reserved and restrained?

Yes, an individual can be both reserved in their willingness to share personal information and restrained in their emotional responses and actions.

What does it mean to be reserved?

Being reserved means you are naturally inclined to keep your thoughts, feelings, and personal life to yourself, often due to a preference for privacy.

Can restraint be learned?

Yes, restraint can be developed through practices like mindfulness, self-reflection, and learning to anticipate the consequences of one's actions.

How can you communicate effectively with someone who is reserved?

To communicate effectively with someone who is reserved, respect their need for privacy, be patient, and create a comfortable environment for them to open up at their own pace.

What might motivate a person to be restrained?

Motivations for restraint include ethical considerations, situational demands, the desire to achieve specific outcomes, and social norms.

Does being reserved affect relationships?

Reserved individuals may take longer to open up, which can affect the speed at which relationships develop, but it doesn't necessarily hinder deep connections.

Is being reserved a sign of shyness?

While being reserved can sometimes stem from shyness, it often reflects a deliberate choice about how much of oneself to share with others.

Do reserved people struggle in social situations?

Reserved individuals may prefer not to engage deeply in large social gatherings, but this doesn’t necessarily mean they struggle socially; they may simply prefer smaller, more intimate settings.

Why is restraint important in professional settings?

Restraint is crucial in professional settings as it promotes diplomacy, prevents conflict, and ensures a respectful and productive work environment.

Can a reserved person become more outgoing?

With time and comfort, reserved individuals can become more outgoing in environments where they feel secure and valued.

How can restraint be a positive trait?

Restraint can be positive as it shows a person's ability to manage their impulses and emotions, contributing to mature and thoughtful interactions.

What are the benefits of being restrained?

The benefits of being restrained include the ability to avoid impulsive decisions, maintain professionalism, and foster respect from others.

How can one develop a more reserved or restrained demeanor?

Developing a more reserved or restrained demeanor involves practicing self-awareness, reflecting on the value of privacy, and exercising control over one's impulses and emotional expressions.

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Author Spotlight

Written by
Maham Liaqat
Co-written by
Fiza Rafique
Fiza Rafique is a skilled content writer at AskDifference.com, where she meticulously refines and enhances written pieces. Drawing from her vast editorial expertise, Fiza ensures clarity, accuracy, and precision in every article. Passionate about language, she continually seeks to elevate the quality of content for readers worldwide.

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